Will You Take Me As I Am?

I’m in bed.

I have a serious sore throat.

I’m about to get my period in the next day or so.

Today I’m not even a mediocre superhero, but simply an untogether, coming apart creature. And that is okay. That is totally cool. That is SO how it simply is. Ain’t nothing I can do except love this lady that I am (and eat great quantities of raw honey and garlic mixed together—cures everything and keeps the vampires— and everyone else as well—at bay).

Tomorrow I’m getting on a plane and flying across an entire ocean and arriving in Paris in the morning. In time for a really good pastry. Even though wheat makes me grumpy.

And not only in time for a really good pastry, but also in time to spend the week in celebration.

My sister is getting married to a lovely man. Paris is their home and so we come to them.  And when I say we I mean practically every relative and close friend on the planet is either already in Paris or will be showing up there in the next few days. This is a grand gift of an event. This is a blessing.

Just imagine your entire home town packing their bags and going to Paris together for the weekend.

No sore throat, cramps, chronic fatigue or grumpiness could keep me away.

I’ll be gone for three weeks and will visit family in England after I leave Paris.

For me this is a retreat.

It isn’t the kind where you go alone to a quiet beautiful retreat center in the woods and sit in silence all day and eat vegetarian meals. I love this kind of retreat.

It is the kind of retreat where you go and spend three weeks with the people you love the most in the world, the people who trigger you the most in the world, you eat strange meals with unidentifiable ingredients in a foreign country, you fall in love with new family and strangers, you make toasts and you dance all night, and wake up in strange beds. And you be yourself. And you take everyone  as they are.  And it is all a meditation in being present in the moment and loving the ones you’re with.  It is that kind of retreat!

The kind where you let go of it being how you imagine it is going to be and you let it be how it is.

I’m so down with this however many times I forget what is present, forget what is really important, forget how insanely blessed my life is, or what and where I really am.

And since I’m going on retreat and since I couldn’t get it together to write a bunch of posts ahead of time (because instead I was taking care of more important things like: the untogether, coming apart creature that I am) life is going to get mighty quiet and meditative and still around here at All is Listening.

So stick around. I’ll be back. Enjoy the silence. And maybe I’ll even find a corner and computer and report from the front lines of my curious retreat. Or not. Who knows.

Be well. Take yourself as you are. Take risks. Sing your song.

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

nancy sheridan April 29, 2011 at 9:02 pm

and i am reveling in the retreat of your homestead with goldie hugging my left arm as i type. this is bliss. this is me letting go of all the edges and seeing what comes up. feeling blessed. ciao.


Jasmine April 30, 2011 at 11:22 am

Nancy, So we are both on retreat. I too am discovering the edges aren’t so clear, what comes next is a mystery, the world unfurls around me. I am so so glad that Goldie and Monkee have your presence there.



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